なぜ?

29 Oct

I was just randomly going over conversations in my mind today(as I normally do – so that I can cringe over the stuff I’ve said which happens a lot or think about stuff talked about etc etc)…and as I often do, I like to refer to my old journal(s) just to see what exactly did I feel at that time… and today, suddenly, I find…

There was a huge gap in my journal entries – huge as in from 10/1/2005(Monday) to 15/1/2006(Tuesday).
Where was my entire life in that one year?

Because I didn’t write it down, so much was lost.
Why then do I remember it as one of the happiest years of my life?(2005 that is)

I mean bad things happened too, but…

Why has that year been painted in rose and gold in my memory?

Why is there that huge gap in my journalling?

When I try to remember…

I think of Sash sitting next to me during BM Set 1 which we originally hated because we thought the teacher has something against us.

I think of Joonie and Gay HengJoseph, and how I would always get up in between classes to go disturb them (haha).

I think of Ben and the two Aarons sitting behind me cracking random jokes and up to their usual things…

I think of times spent in the lecture theatre or chapel area with the rest of the CF committee, laughing and talking nonsense but also growing together in God (and also of the minutes I had to write week after week after week).

I think of Raish and the times we were giggling over the randomest things that we could barely talk(and also of the songs we used to sing together ^^).

I think about See Ki running around and Jia Chyi stoically sitting beside her, brimming full with her unique sense of humour.

I think of quiet hours I spent in the library arranging or wrapping books with no one else nearby, missing having the older librarians around to talk to (though sometimes I would be drawn in for a chat with Mdm Zubaidah and/or Mrs Peter and/or Mdm Shirley).

I think of Manda. And what I should have done.

I think of En. I think of Gymramma. And … =(

…Is that all I have left from that year?
What were the milestones? What were the triumphs? What were the failures?

Wasn’t that the year I finally got over one ghost of my past, at last able to prove something to myself?

…Oops. I just got a whisper that I think I ought to heed.
Actually I definitely should heed.

Let it go.


終わりました。

5 Responses to “なぜ?”

  1. sulin October 29, 2008 at 10:25 pm #

    わたしはおぼ得ていますか。 haha

  2. liyenn October 30, 2008 at 9:18 am #

    I lurv the fact that i ‘understand’ jap…hahahahahaahahaa =)

    all the best cramming!! to the both of u…if the other sees my comment =)

  3. Tooth Fairy/Secret Angel November 9, 2008 at 4:34 pm #

    I totally agree with what sulin said. XP

  4. Ven Xhin November 9, 2008 at 8:14 pm #

    lol!
    su lin asked if i remembered her =D

  5. Tooth Fairy/Secret Angel November 12, 2008 at 1:19 am #

    HAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!XD

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Peter Galen Massey

Haiku, Book Reviews, Commentary & The Occasional Nonsense

bottledworder

easy reading is damn hard writing

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